Dr. Joseph Suglia, Author of WATCH OUT

The first author to brave Danger was the illustrious Dr. Joseph Suglia, author of WATCH OUT and greatest author in the world (just reference his MySpace page). Check him out, then buy his book.

DD: What is your favorite word, and why? Least favorite?

JS: My favorite word is “to auto-sodomize.” My least favorite word is “to stymie.”

DD: If you had to carry out a murder, what would be your weapon of choice?

JS: A corn holder.

DD: In the shower, do you sing or is it just straightforward washing?

JS: I sing, I warble, I burble, I babble on my Shower-Phone, I cook food in my waterproof microwave, I lather my perineum, I bathe my pigeons.

DD: In a world full of alter ego superheroes, what would be your name?

JS: “The Him.”

DD: Which body part would you choose to lose?

JS: My head. I wouldn’t mind decapitation, as long as my luscious body remained intact.

DD: What is your favorite Beatles song?

JS: The Beatles are the most overestimated band in rock-musical history. The first 1.5 minutes of “Happiness is a Warm Gun” are superb; everything else they manufactured is sound-dross.

DD: Is meat really murder?

JS: Meat, in itself, is not murder, but it may be used as a weapon. A moist steak is more annihilative than an AK-47, a hand grenade, or a land mine.

DD: Do you prefer fucking, sex or making love?

JS: I prefer none of the above. I am married to myself. I have entangled myself in the coils of lust. I am my own Significant Other, my own mistress, my own concubine, and my own wife. No one concerns me but myself.

DD: Which author would you choose to write the story of your life?

JS: No one will ever write the story of my life. I will leave no memoirs. My life is a vortex that swallows itself.

DD: Finally, what is your favorite book and why do you recommend it?

JS: WATCH OUT by Dr. Joseph Suglia, for it is far and away the greatest novel of the past thirty years. I say this not as the book’s author, but as a literary critic. It is also the principal accomplishment of my life.